Nicole Kropf

Recently our family had the opportunity to “raise” caterpillars and to observe as they went through their metamorphosis. It was actually quite remarkable and we learned a lot through out the process – a lot of which seems pretty applicable to our own human journey. So I thought I’d share some of the things that we learned with all of you.

The transition that caterpillars undergo is nothing short of remarkable. When the caterpillars make their chrysalides, the outer skin is pushed back and scrunched up. Or according to our kids, the butterflies “leave their butts out of the chrysalides.” Essentially, they remove that which no longer fits their needs. Additionally, when the butterfly emerges they excrete something called meconium – a red fluid that is essentially the leftover bits of the caterpillar that are not needed in the butterfly stage. These “leftovers” are stored in the intestines of the butterfly and expelled upon emerging.

As we grow, we too are going to find that there are things in our lives that we no longer need moving forward. Whether thoughts or ideas, expectations, old dreams, or toxic relationships -If we want to live life to our fullest capacity, we will have to leave some of these things behind. It’s okay – healthy even- to let go of some of the things that no longer serve us. But just as the butterflies leak the red fluid of their pasts, our change too may at times be messy. Growth is work that requires reshaping and letting go.

When caterpillars are pupating, the majority of their body apparently breaks down into cells that are similar to human stem cells – cells that can become any other type of cell.  It’s pretty close to a complete rebuild. The cells arrange themselves in an entirely new way. Most of the same pieces remain but when the butterfly emerges, they are unrecognizable.

Similarly, throughout our lives, we will experience change. We will find ourselves broken down and it will take a ridiculous amount of time and energy and focus to rebuild. We will have to look at where we’ve come from and determine where we are headed. Like the butterflies, we will need to let go of the things that no longer serve us and we will have to do the work of putting ourselves back together. Most of the same pieces will remain but when we emerge, we may be unrecognizable.

We had 2 butterflies who emerged but whose wings never filled out. They did all of  the right things, they received the same care in the same space, and yet, no amount of hanging upside down would allow their wings to stretch out. Their differences didn’t stop them from trying to fly anyway. They would jump and flip and climb but simply couldn’t fly. We woke up one morning to find that one of them had died. The other made a home in our garden and became our kids favourite because they were able to visit with it frequently.

Some of us will easily adapt to the changes we experience in life, others will find that they have to work quite a bit harder to find their way through. It will seem unfair and it may hurt. Sometimes, like the butterflies who can’t fly, we will find that some goals are perpetually beyond our reach. But that doesn’t mean that we have to give up. We may not be able to fly, but we can surely jump, flip, and climb. While we won’t all find the sky, we can still find our garden – a space in this world that is filled with beauty and warmth – a space that meets our needs and enriches our lives – a space surrounded by those who love us.

Perhaps the most difficult part of this process was that we lost a few along the way. Not all of our caterpillars emerged as triumphant butterflies. Not all of our butterflies found their way into the wide open sky.

Likewise, not all of us are going to make it through life’s trials and transitions. There are going to be unforeseen events that will rob some of us the future we hope for. We will lose dear ones on our path, some seemingly before their journeys have even begun. It is heartbreaking. It is unfair. But as my 5 year old son learned, “I guess if we want to live, we’re going to have to die too.” Death is an inescapable part of our journey. So it’s all the more important that we pour our whole selves into this one glorious life. It’s crucial that when we find ourselves in a period of transition, we learn, we let go, and we do our very best to rebuild toward our best life. And though we don’t know for certain what our future holds, shouldn’t we at least try to fly?